Bee Movie

Well, since Rob can't take me on a date, due to the insurmountable piles of notes and outlines for finals, Luke did! We went to see the animated "BEE MOVIE." It was great! I really enjoyed it. The only part that almost had Luke running for the doors was when Barry (Jerry) was nearly flushed down the toilet. Luckily he ended up surfing the waves on a nail file and I was able to spin the scare into a cool trick the bee did...Whew! (Luke has had a few nightmares about mommy going down the drain and so he has some fear when watching that sort of thing. Oddly enough he still enjoys bath time.) Afterwards we walked around the mall and talked to Santa. He loved telling him what he wanted for Christmas and it was a good low-key (the mall was empty) way to reintroduce St. Nicholas before we attempt pictures with him.

I have to say, Luke was a great date... He held my hand, said thanks, and didn't hog the popcorn! The down side is that I was a little sad that the day will come when he is too cool to sit alone at a movie with his mom. (Sigh) I think it was time we both needed. I loved spending the quiet time with him. We actually talked and I was in love with his personality which as many of you know can be a source of my impatience on an ordinary day. It just goes to show you how easy it is to get caught up in life and other kids and spouses and friends that you miss some of the simple joys. Hopefully, I will find more opportunities to tune into Luke and have our special time again.

Anyway, here is my plug to go see the movie! It was cute and funny! There isn't even a true villain or evil one which is nice for a change.

Chinese Water Torture!

I had to share this witty metaphor from my friend, Kristi. As a disclaimer, she is one of the most patient moms I know and has the sweetest little girl, too! We were discussing our kids and how these three year olds are relentless when they want something. She proceeded to compare their whining and nagging for stuff as, "Chinese Water Torture...slow and painful!" I died laughing as she continued to say, "I want a candy cane. Can I have a candy cane? I want a candy cane? Can I have a candy cane now? " in her best three year old voice.

Oh, isn't it the truth? You moms out there know the sheer stubbornness of a toddler. I am regularly amazed by it. How can their will power be stronger than ours? We literally are worn down and cave to their pleas and bargaining (water torture) just so the nagging can stop. (I wonder if that is how my husband feels when I remind him frequently about the trash going out on time...) Thank you, Kristi, for bringing humor to what so often beats us down as parents and getting me to laugh about it!

You know the saying, "if Mom ain't happy, ain't nobody happy," well, I think it should really read, "if the toddler ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." Maybe that would explain why we go to all ends to keep them from having fits so they can smile and coo at us. At the end of the day, we love them and we please them the best we can..."Yes, you can have a candy cane!!" (the dripping stops)

Dear Santa...

This year I would like one relaxing Christmas holiday please. I am desperate for feeling the reason for the season and seeing Christmas light displays. I love Christmas and all it has to offer. Last year was our first holiday home and we all got the flu for Christmas. This year we've made the decision to stay home again and I pray we have zero incidents of illness. I want to read the Christmas story with my kids, make Christmas cookies galore, drive by houses with lights, sing carols, and sit in the dark admiring my Christmas tree handy work. Oh I forgot watching all the Christmas movie classics! Luke has already been picking out stuff for Santa to bring like crazy.

I do have to say that holidays spent with family are wonderful, though. I think this year it will feel weird to have no grandma's houses to visit or other peoples yummy food to taste. We just had the entire Morgan family visit for Thanksgiving and it was fabulous. We truly had a nice time. I will post pictures soon.

I go a little crazy over the holidays with spending money and shopping. I love to give gifts! I really do. I love buying for the kids in my life and I love buying for my loved ones. This year we are trying to scale back and really stick to the basics of the holiday. I want my kids to know how important and meaningful this holiday really is because of Christ, not the gifts. Then I can go crazy on their birthdays! So, if anyone has any good holiday traditions and local events that are worth doing please share!

personality quiz

you are blueviolet #8A2BE2

Your dominant hues are blue and magenta. You're the one who goes to all the parties but doesn't quite fit in at every one... you know what you want, but are afraid of what the world might think of it. You're a little different and that's okay with them, and if you're smart it's okay with you too. Your saturation level is higher than average - You know what you want, but sometimes know not to tell everyone. You value accomplishments and know you can get the job done, so don't be afraid to run out and make things happen. Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.

the spacefem.com html color quiz

Pushing our kids to do our best

For those of you who don't know, my son, Luke, is getting speech therapy through a free county program. It consists of a great little home visit for about 45 minutes each week. Lucas has incredible language and reasoning skills, he just needs some articulation modification. His articulation makes his language difficult to understand, especially in conversation. Anyway, I have noticed that Luke will not practice for me and rarely for Rob, but during his sessions he is awesome. One thing I have learned about my son is that he responds to correction and critique much better from others than from me. I even try to sneak my corrections in so he doesn't realize they are changing his way, but it didn't take him long to grow wise to my tricks. Therefore, I am glad he is making progress with his teacher, but I can't help but wonder if I am too pushy.

Pushing our kids is healthy as long as their self-esteem doesn't suffer from feeling like our love depends on their successes. With that definition in mind, I don't feel Luke is suffering. I do think he has an objection to authority and anything that reminds him who is the boss, who knows more, or who can ultimately trump his control or his decisions...namely, ME! Luke is a walking contradiction. He wants so badly to show off for me, but won't allow me to help or model in anyway. He is a prideful and independent sucker! Like so many of his qualities, this will prove to be valuable in the future, although I worry about how hard I should push to teach him that criticism is OK and valuable to learning.

I realized the other day that Luke does understand some of what we are trying to do in parenting. He was trying to talk to Rob about a "Mask." Rob couldn't understand him because of his speech, so once Rob figured out the word, he tried to model the correct way to say it. Luke responded with, "No, Dad! I want to do MY best, NOT YOUR best!" As long as he fixes and corrects behavior for Mom and Dad, he feels he is doing "our best." I suppose that right now his best is the best. That is my new motto!

How many of you can actually say that what you teach your kids is completely unselfish...isn't part of it to reflect what a wonderful mom you are? Aren't you secretly proud of yourself when your child is exemplary in manners, speech, academics, etc? I know I am. We are human, and for most of us this is our most important and all encompassing job. In any other job we would have some sort of external benchmarks to determine our success. What are our benchmarks for being a good mom? Hence, the question...are we pushing our kids to do our best or theirs? Boy, my son sure did give me a new perspective to consider! And that is what being a parent is...I love that kid!

My hubby gets mega-points for...

1. getting up in the morning with the kids this weekend because I was sick with the flu.
2. laying down with Luke to get him to sleep (which worked) so I could take a nap.
3. cuddling up close to keep me from shivering as I had a 102.8 fever and couldn't warm up.
4. feeding the kids breakfast Sat-Mon so I could get up slowly.
5. getting up with Luke 2 times last night to clean up minor puke and get him something to drink because I was back with a fever and sick as a dog... I didn't even have to ask.
6. making up ridiculous bedtime stories for Luke who is demanding them every night for bed.
7. telling gospel stories to Luke at bedtime.
8. kissing and hugging all of us as we are doing our best to get him sick too!
9. bathed Carys before bed.
10. doing all this and worked on a school paper and baked a pecan pie.

Wow! I have a wonderful man, don't I? I love you, Rob. I am sad he went to work today, but I am sure he was happy to go. We really have been pretty miserable this weekend. Hopefully we will be on the mend soon. Luke is showing signs of getting better. We will reemerge soon!

"You can't have a normal life!"

Well, today what I always suspected was made crystal clear to me.

Rob and I were talking and I sarcastically said, "I just want a normal life."

In response to this statement Luke said, "You can't have a normal life!"

I was holding back both my tears and my laughter and said, "Why can't I have a normal life, Luke, what is stopping me?" (a guess it was a leading question.)

My brutally honest son said, "I am and my daddy are stopping you and you can't have a normal life."

AHA! I knew it wasn't a figment of my imagination...the feeling of running on a hamster wheel and getting nowhere! J/K I thought that was pretty funny especially because I wasn't complaining about my life and he has no idea what a normal life is. He just thought I wanted to change something and he didn't like that idea. Kids say the craziest things!

Disclaimer: It is true that the normal life I once knew doesn't exist, but the new normal is one I would never exchange for anything else in the world. OK, well I guess I would prefer meals without food on the floor and not waking up to whines and cries, but other than that, I love my normal life.

Help! Indulgence is my vice!

Today was my stake conference. Rob went alone and I attended last night. Today he filled me in on one speaker's talk on indulgence. Overall, I do agree that we, as a society, are incredibly indulgent. I have a really hard time admitting my own indulgence. Do I feel entitled? I know plenty of people that have what I call the "entitlement mentality." I don't feel that I represent that type of person. However, I do treat myself to any food, treat, or "indulgence" that I see fit as my little reward for making it through my day.

I like to think I am more a creature of habit than an indulgent one. For example, shortly after Carys was born I discovered Chocolate Dipped Sundae Cones. For every day that I made it through when Rob was gone late, I got my ice cream treat as I unwound on the couch or in bed. I did see it as a reward. I looked forward to it during the day and planned when I would buy more so never to run out of my treat. Well, my adjustment to two kids finally got easier and I didn't need the reward, but I did begin my ice cream habit. (I gladly state that I no longer am slave to the chocolate dipped cones.)

This same cycle has occured with fast food, shopping, movies, tivo, or whatever I decide I "deserve" for the day. I paid little attention to the expense. I paid little attention to the fat calories. I paid little attention to how much time my kids are in the car. Perhaps it was my escape? Who knows, but as Rob and I discussed the problem of indulgence in lives and families, I felt guilt. My friends know that it doesn't take much to make me feel guilty, but in this instance it was well placed. It is healthy guilt and I truly need to reassess my life. Am I teaching my kids the same cycle of indulgence and rewards. Am I being short-sighted rather than looking to the future? My husband would answer with a hearty, "yes!" Most of the indulgence brings immediate joy and really doesn't bring too much long term happiness...just ask my thighs and disorganized house that have both been neglected. Actually, I can happily say the changes have already begun this fall, so I can rest easier knowing I am on the path of least indulgence...well, maybe after I eat my chocolate for the night! :)

Walkin' and Talkin' little shadow

So, we've had quite a week with Carys. She is walking everywhere finally. Yesterday she was in her skunk costume and it was adorable to watch her wobble with her tail swinging back and forth. For those of you who know me, you know I have long awaited the moment when I can just put her down! She is a load! Of course along with this wonderful new skill comes the shadow phase. You moms out there know this feeling. The supposed independent walkers latch to your leg or follow you wherever you go. Hence, your little shadow has appeared. :)

Now that Carys can walk she has to find a new way to get me. Last night, she yelled, "MAMA." I was thrilled at her little attempt to make me come back as I was speedily walking away, leaving her with Rob. (all the while knowing she wouldn't be that happy with my departure) Of course, I did turn around and make a huge deal about her calling me. She could tell I was happy and I was.

Not only is this a breakthrough for her, but it is a big one in my mommy world. Luke called me, "Ba" until he was nearly 2. Carys has been calling me, "da." I know the books say "da-da," is easier for babies to say, but who is the one nurturing these kids practically 24 hours a day? Can't I at least get a "mama?" Seriously, Luke called my mom, "emom," my grandmother, "mom mom," grandma was ,"ammom," and I was,"BA!" Let's just hope Carys keeps up the MAMA and I can bask in the glory for a while until she is talking up a storm and you wish they never knew your name! (But, Mom, I want to! or Mom, please can I...?)

Another first for Carys was the lollipop! A nice mommy at church gave her the first tootsie pop she's ever had. It was sticky. It was red. It tasted like watermelon, with tootsie roll inside. It was all over her face, hands, and clothes. It was all a lollipop should be. She LOVED it! We loved watching her savor every last lick. She even "Mmm"ed while she sucked on it. It was great and it kept her quiet. I'd say her second Halloween is off to a yummy start!
(thanks Alysia!)

I am giving this blog thing another whirl!

Ok, so it has been over a year since I attempted a blog. Lately, I've had the itch to try again. My update is pretty much the same. Rob is still in school, but it is his last year! Carys is 16 months and finally starting to walk with some confidence. Luke is an amazing toddler with so much to say. He is in preschool and loves it. I have turned over a new leaf and have begun to work-out. Those of you who know me, know that this is no small feat. My only problem is that my eating habits aren't willing to change. :) We have a new addition to our family...Captain Hook. He is a big shaggy golden-doodle puppy with tons of enthusiasm. Sometimes that is wonderful and other times, I want to lock him outside with the scraps of my chair or paper towels he shred while I was out. I am still blown away by the cute things my kids do and I love how new life is for them. One of Luke's cutest sayings is, "I am possibility Luke, that means I can do what I want, Mom, I am possibility Luke." I will use this blog to store these cute things and my HMMM moments as a mom, wife, woman, friend, and just plain old Julie!

You know you're a mom of a toddler when...

your best argument for humming in the car when your three year old tells you to stop is, "I was humming first!"

I am often puzzled by the immature comments that come out of my mouth when I am dealing with my kids. I don't know if it is the exhaustion talking or that the majority of my conversations are with a 3 year old and 1 year old, but sometimes I sound like I am 3! Today I literally argued like my son does. The other day, I found myself telling Luke, "I don't want to, Luke!" in a really whiny voice. Do I think he will understand better if I speak and sound like him? It is like that commercial with the mom that talks baby-talk all day long and then goes out for the evening with her hubby and accidentally speaks baby-talk to him.

I just hope I don't start behaving like a 3 year old. My friend, Kristi and I often laugh at the possibility of throwing fits and crying like a kid when we don't get our way or get angry. In some ways it is so simple and may even bring some relief from our adult ways of keeping things pent up. Just imagine it...a little screaming, a little kicking, a lot of crying and stomping, maybe we could even go to time-out to cool down, but darn it if we wouldn't get that little black dress we want or the nice house with a garage. And boy those who ticked us off would know they did so!

Maybe these little toddlers are on to something.

Well, we are still here in Virginia. We are counting down the days, with tears in our eyes, until Rob returns to school. There goes my third and fourth hand, my partner in crime, my master griller, my swim instructor, my maintenance and lawn guy, my co-discipliarian, my couch potatoe partner, and my park ranger/camp director. Boy, he does a lot around here! Well, two more years of school and then we can officially be rid of long study hours and sleepless weekends. However, we are going to exchange those for long work hours and over scheduled weekends. We have a new addition to our family...Carys Elizabeth. She is a perfect fit in our family. She is quiet and low maintenance as opposed to her brother or mother who are neither. Rob needed another family member more like him. Luke is still the center of the universe; just ask him. He demands time, energy and basically whatever his little heart desires right now, but then again, don't all two year olds? In his defense, he is a bright and handsome boy, who challenges everything and everyone as he is trying to figure where he fits in this overwhelming world. He is surprisingly flexible with the new baby and lack of predictability that brings. For that, I am grateful. I have to keep that in mind when he falls to pieces over something as typical as putting on your shoes. I guess that is a good update. We love virginia and welcome any visitors.