http://resourcefulmommy.blogspot.com/2010/02/30-days-of-change-parenting-challenge.html
Rather than do one every day, I decided to do a few and take some time to to do them. Some of the challenges I already do, which made me happy, so I am not going to report on them. In fact, I decided I do not want to report on this beyond this final post. I don't want my blog to become a forum to discuss my parenting skills. It is supposed to be about my children and our family as a whole and a place where I record such things like memories, experiences, and feelings related to those things.
So, these are the challenges I have been working on...
Go an entire day without taking any action based on what you've seen another parent do - how many times a day to do you worry about keeping up or being judged. this was HARD! As a mom, I don't think we realize how influenced we are by others--and by others I mean other moms. how often do I scan a parking lot to see it anyone will see me yelling at my kids to get their seats? Even worse is when I turn into super mom around the PTA crowd just to make sure my kid won't be ostracized because of me. I am a worrier and by kid #3 I have shed most of my silly concerns and accepted who I am. I think in some ways I feel I have earned that and deserve to feel good about what I do as a mom. Baby #1 will in some ways always be the guinea pig, but I no longer feel the enormous guilt of not keeping up or meeting the same bar as other moms. Now, I set my own bar and I am happy with it. This challenge reminded me of that. My mom always said, "no body knows better what is best for your children than you do. Believe that you have mother's intuition and trust yourself."
Take time to talk to them about something that you really like about them - most children feel loved by their parents, but help them feel liked,
I really liked this challenge! I am awesome about telling my kids I love them a million times a day, but do they know I like them? I think this was great for my relationship with my oldest who is learning to like himself and building that confidence while making friendships at school. I also found it difficult to put these feelings into words. "LOVE" just encompasses it for me and so it was good to really get thoughtful about what was special and likable for each child.
Stop doing what you're doing when you say you will stop - no more "just a minute..." I am terrible at this! I am constantly saying, "just a minute." My oldest are put off all day long for phone calls, baby feedings, household chores and such. I think it was fun for us all to really STOP and DO! I hope I can do this more often because this time goes too quickly with them young.
Keep yourself from saying “How many times have I told you….” for the entire day! I failed this challenge miserably. This is soooo difficult for me! My kids are classic ignorers (not a word, I know). My pleas typically fall on deaf ears and while I hate repeating myself, I do it more often than not. Therefore, I end up saying this many times. I tried to stop, but I need to keep working.
To conclude this exercise, I will keep striving to be a better and more conscientious parent. I am a self-help book junkie and so this was fun for me to set little goals and see the difference they made in my sometimes monotonous life. Maybe some day my children will appreciate the efforts I took to be better for them, although I will never be perfect and I am almost positive I will hear the words, "I hate you" at some point in their teenage years. All part of the gig, right?! And you have to love them and it!
No comments:
Post a Comment